Dear Internet, How I Have Missed Thee!

Dear Internet,

I must confess that I am writing to you while not wearing any underthings. No one is here to care, and I’m sure you don’t mind, but I just wanted to clear the air here. What you also can’t see is that I am in my pajamas post 3-day shower hiatus cleansing shower. (I realize this sentence is awkward and may not make sense and I’m sorry, but I am slightly giddy with pajama-clad freedom)  Why get dressed if you don’t have to? That’s a philosophy I’ve subscribed to since I was young and weekends involved no jeans until at least 5 p.m. when it was house-leaving time. Being a night shift employee only accentuates those tendencies, and I used to spend whole weekdays in my pajamas playing rule-edited Monopoly with a toddler. Now that getting dressed is a necessity 7 days out of 7, today feels wildly decadent.

Internet, I must also confess that I have missed you with a raging passion. Only I didn’t realize it, because I have been too busy to step back and realize how lonely I was without you. I spent this morning reading the blogs I haven’t had time to catch up on and commenting on many of them. Commenting! I used to obsessively comment and now I haven’t in weeks and weeks. My head was so full of unsaid unhilarious replies to posts that I couldn’t clickety-click out of there, and it was getting crowded. Now that I’ve freed up that space, I spent the hour after blog time watching TV. But not just one show- no, internet; unfettered TV time can’t be wasted in that way! I watched the beginning of a cheesy horror movie whose title escapes me – the one with the girl my cousin once christened Lightbulb Head when she was in Noxema commercials starring in it – and then part of the Royal Tenenbaums, which I now realize I have to watch again soon; and then slices of several home decor/remodeling shows and some Ina Garten pasta recipe and a commercial with a cute dog rolling over.

How does anyone get anything done with both TV and internet at their disposal? I have 6 chapters of textbook and a short essay to write before tomorrow, and I have cracked the book and set out my highlighters and pulled out a notebook and a pen and moved no further. So now I need to go do that and stop linking to silly shit and posting silly shit (though did I mention the missing of you, internet? You are dear to me and I am so happy to see you again!)

Love,
Melanie